Years ago, order I used to carry around two clippings from the L.A. Times in my wallet.

The first one was described how, ask on a ferry in China, sick or somewhere, there was a fistfight on one of the outside decks. When the 300 passengers swarmed to the side of the ferry to watch the fight, it capsized, killing most of them.

The other one I had was the best piece of comedy writing I’d ever seen. I had a feeling that the guy writing it for AP realized that he had comedy gold in his hands and was sending out subversion on a massive scale. It was perfect “pull back & reveal” comedy writing.

Imagine the following much with more eloquence and patience than mine.

A few sentences about a shooting in a bar.
A few sentences revealing it was a gay bar.
A few sentences dealing with the shock and feeling of senselessness of the patrons.
The final sentence was something like:

“The suspect, John Gay, 42, is being held with no bail.”

Absolutely perfect. Perfect.

Sometimes, when I’m at Starbucks, I like to test the bruise and read the L.A. Times. I’ve begun tearing out little articles and snippets that I think are important.


This is great because it sums up the self-centered thinking that drives socialism. “We want someone to force you to make us comfortable.”

we are doomed

I know, I know… This isn’t funny. It’s not funny one bit. But… you know…

i know. not funny.

Whenever I hear people thank god for someone coming through an intense operation instead of thanking the doctors, I feel that it would be okay if the doctor then cut off life support.