Rockula
I went to the New Beverly Theater, three blocks from my youth and hope, to talk before a screening of Rockula. I did not anticipate that the people who came to see the movie were actually people who liked my work. I figured they’d be there ironically or to give me a hard time because that’s what everyone else does.
Someone actually called me on it. “You’re kicking my puppy, dude.” and he was right. I did own up to it… I was poo-pooing my work before anyone else could so as to protect myself. I guess I’ve been around people who took that stuff for granted and I believed their anti-hype instead of owning the fact that there really are people who don’t give a fuck that I’m not with a big agency like CAA or ICM or William Morris anymore. They were kids when I was in the show bizness.
I mean, I didn’t completely fall on my sword, but I didn’t need to even bring the sword out. They were excited enough to see Rockula, that they went to see it at Midnight in L.A.
I’d met the guy who I did the QyA with in Napa at a SpamScam shoe. He introduced himself as my biggest fan and I’d signed a Ski School poster for him. When Phil, the guy running the New Bev, mentioned that the guy who was going to do the QyA was from up north and was my biggest fan, I knew exactly who it was. Very cool.
It’s weird. They’re a little ironic. He said they’re post ironic. He screens movies in SF that are similar in scope to some of the stuff I’ve done but really loves them. I really hope I’m not a joke. Man, that would suck.
Showbiz seems to have fucked me up. Though, I suppose that happens in any career one is passionate about. I bet doctors get fucked up about being doctors. I know they do.
I suppose I’m lucky that I had a career that I was passionate about for so long that I was recognized for.
Nutty. Rockula.
Could be worse. It could be Marmaduke. Or Avatar. Cynical bullshit that people are making so they can buy shit. Fucking Marmaduke.
What a bunch of assholes. Only a real asshole cuntshit would be proud of Marmaduke.
“Yeah, I’ve always had a vision of dogs and cats doing a synchronized dance in a park.”
Kill yourself you fucking cynical studio executive. And you, Owen Wilson, you should be ashamed of yourself. Lazy bitch.
I know they’re justifying it to themselves. “Hey, I can’t help what people want to see. The studio is making Marmaduke and they’ve offered me all this money. It’s going to be in theaters. I need to be in theaters.”
Asshole. Fucking Marmaduke.
“…and then, see, Marmaduke causes all this mayhem in the park on the day the guy has got to impress his boss…”
“…oh, beautiful!! hilarious… i can see it now… hey, how about some cgi? he talks, right?”
“what? oh, yeah,um, of course!!! he talks… yeah!”
“I just had a meeting with Fergie’s people… how about her as Marmaduke’s love interest? That blue eyed peas can do a rap song at the end. We can get it on phones. kids eat that shit up, like a dog eats its own puke.”
“Fucking genius!! We’re going to have Avatar sucking dog dick!!!”
“Fuck yeah. We’ll take out an ad monday after opening: AVATAR SUCKS BIG FAT DOG COCK!!!”
“HEY. READY? …THE DOGS DANCE IN THE PARK!!! TO A FERGIE SONG OR SOMETHING. NO! SOMETHING UPBEAT AND HOT!!! MAYBE OVER THE CREDITS. OR JUST PUT IT IN THE GOD DAMNED TRAILER!!!”
“…SUCK MY DOG COCK, BUDDY, GREEN LIGHT THAT SHIT, BABY! HEY, JAMES CAMERON, MARMADUKE HAS A LIPSTICK!!!! MARMADUKE HAS A LIPSTICK!!!”
William H. Macy tells himself that it’s a studio picture and that he can take that money and go back to Chicago and do some more theater. Or he has a house payment. Or something. “Hey, they’re gonna fuckin’ make the fuckin’ movie, right? I’m not getting a million bucks doing Mamet, that’s for sure… They’re making it whether I’m in it or not. Fuck it. So I do a talking dog movie. It’ll be fun working with Owen. Well, maybe I’ll see him at the screening. Ah… fuck it, A million bucks is a million bucks. Now that Felicity’s not bringing in… Hell, it’ll be nice to take the kids to see it… A million bucks. What the hell.”
Marmaduke.
Fucking Marmaduke.
And I can’t get a fucking agent. What a bunch of fucking assholes. Truly. You people making Marmaduke should kiss a dog’s lipstick.
Asshole.
Acting Good!
My old, old, old and I do mean OLD friend, Patrick Laybyorteaux, has created a really funny web site: http://www.actinggood.com.
If you’ve seen me in stuff, then you have seen Patrick in stuff. Before I was fired from show business, we used to be in movies and t.v. shoes together. Patrick, however, was allowed back in to the movie and television business and did a series you never saw, but everyone else in the country watched: JAG.
We also co-wrote “Hollywood Palms” together. The “quick, down and dirty” project that took almost 10 years to get made.
Regardless, check out actinggood.com
You’ll act good. Real good.
ME ME ME ME!!!
I’m thinking about getting an agent again. So I was looking for my reels. (No, i was not up at 2am, googling “dean cameron” and weeping… not recently, anyway…) and happend upon the video below.
All I can say is: muy bueno!
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObQkVnERA3g
An important reminder
Neither Conan O’brien nor Jay Leno give a fuck about you.
It’s worth thinking about for a minute.
The same way you might want to think about how little the guys on “your team” think about you before your week is ruined by “your team’s” performance in “the finals”.
That’s all.
Paracinema
A young writer in the NYC area did a really nice profile piece about me in a magazine so hip they’re not online called “Paracinema”. He interviewed a couple of co-stars and at least one famous old friend of mine and wrote some really insightful, sweet things about me, my work, my past and my future.
In other news…
We are about 3 weeks from D-Day (Duncan-Day) and The Bride is firmly in the “please get this out of me” portion of pregnancy. I’m hoping he waits until after TAM 7 as we’re scheduled to perform the Nigerian Spam Scam Scam show program then.
We just need to get the car seats installed and we’re ready… if you’re not counting the money and jobs part, that is.
My oh my, how fucked we are and it was so promising a few short months ago.
Bring it on, dickheads.
d’Anconia’s money speech
Hot damn!!!
I wish that I had read this when I was making good money.
Hot damn. This is good stuff.
Were I king of the world, I would pay a theater company full of libertarians (hahahahahahaha) a million dollars to spend a year workshopping the book into a stage production. It would be as long or longer than Nicholas Nickleby.
Or… a summer mini-series on HBO or Showtime. It would change the world.
Or people would laugh at it because it is so beautifully moral and idealistic.
When I read her stuff I feel like such an asshole. Her faith in the potential of humans. The way she demands one to be the best version of themselves.
Man.
When I listen to this book and read these passages again, my brain is infected by the assholes who sneer at her. I might have been one of them a long time ago.
You go, Ayn Rand. You go and you rock it.
Apparently, Atlas Shrugged is selling like gangbusters now. People are snatching it up. We are hungry for this purity. The cynicism of what’s going on in government is heartbreaking.
It seems like watching the end of the Titanic rise out of the sea right before it disappears forever.
Coolest guy in the universe
Yes, I’m a little late on this but…
Coreyoke has added the Animalsess’s “house of the rising sun” and I stumbled upon this video of The Animals performing the song on some 60′s T.V. shoe.
Eric Burdon is so fucking cool in this. Mercy.
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hg7jzi9JAkw
more for the hipsters to sneer at…
This makes my heart soar….
Atlas Shrugged Tops Amazon’s Bestseller List
By Ayn Rand Center, 3/18/2009 9:05:51 AMWashington, D.C. – Earlier this year Ayn Rand’s prophetic novel Atlas Shrugged was selling at triple the rate it sold at in the beginning of 2008.
Now the novel is soaring to even greater heights, and its trade paperback edition is currently in first place in the Classics category on Amazon.com’s best-seller list for sales in the United States.
The 50th anniversary mass-market paperback edition of Atlas Shrugged ranks as #2 and the trade paperback Centennial edition ranks as #3. For several weeks Atlas Shrugged has been holding steady in the top 10 best-sellers in the broader United States Literature and Fiction category, and as of the writing of this release, different editions of the novel stand at #3, #5 and #6 in Amazon’s ranking.
In a recent Wall Street Journal op-ed, Yaron Brook, executive director of the Ayn Rand Institute, explained the parallels between Atlas Shrugged and today’s events.
“In Atlas Shrugged, Rand tells the story of the U.S. economy crumbling under the weight of crushing government interventions and regulations. Meanwhile, blaming greed and the free market, Washington responds with more controls that only deepen the crisis. Sound familiar?”
Brook also stressed the importance today of the book’s often overlooked message that capitalism cannot be properly defended without morally defending profit and self-interest: “. . . only an ethic of rational selfishness can justify the pursuit of profit that is the basis of capitalism–and that as long as self-interest is tainted by moral suspicion, the profit motive will continue to take the rap for every imaginable (or imagined) social ill and economic disaster. Just look how our present crisis has been attributed to the free market instead of government intervention–and how proposed solutions inevitably involve yet more government intervention to rein in the pursuit of self-interest.”
Those interested in understanding the morality of capitalism can learn more in Ayn Rand’s The Virtue of Selfishness–which, at #12 in the Classics category, is setting records of its own.
Copyright © 2009 Ayn Rand® Institute. All rights reserved.
Chinese Ferry Accident
Years ago, I used to carry around two clippings from the L.A. Times in my wallet.
The first one was described how, on a ferry in China, or somewhere, there was a fistfight on one of the outside decks. When the 300 passengers swarmed to the side of the ferry to watch the fight, it capsized, killing most of them.
The other one I had was the best piece of comedy writing I’d ever seen. I had a feeling that the guy writing it for AP realized that he had comedy gold in his hands and was sending out subversion on a massive scale. It was perfect “pull back & reveal” comedy writing.
Imagine the following much with more eloquence and patience than mine.
A few sentences about a shooting in a bar.
A few sentences revealing it was a gay bar.
A few sentences dealing with the shock and feeling of senselessness of the patrons.
The final sentence was something like:
“The suspect, John Gay, 42, is being held with no bail.”
Absolutely perfect. Perfect.
Sometimes, when I’m at Starbucks, I like to test the bruise and read the L.A. Times. I’ve begun tearing out little articles and snippets that I think are important.
Enjoy.
This is great because it sums up the self-centered thinking that drives socialism. “We want someone to force you to make us comfortable.”
I know, I know… This isn’t funny. It’s not funny one bit. But… you know…
Whenever I hear people thank god for someone coming through an intense operation instead of thanking the doctors, I feel that it would be okay if the doctor then cut off life support.
Wow
1979 with Colin Gentry and Hal Belknap. Check out Colin’s stupid Ovation guitar. Insanity.
I’ll never again have that much hair or be that skinny unless a wild animal eats me.
crimony
